Let's see now, what was really important in the news this week. Oh yeah, Deflategate! The NFL accused America's Quarterback, Tom Brady, of cheating with his deflated footballs. I guess that will make the big game coming up next week, more interesting for non-football fans. Ordinary people may tune in to see if Brady goes spiraling down the Super "Bowl" without his limp Pigskin. Personally, I want to play Tom Brady in the new Mafia movie "The Ballfather".
In International news, Obama snubbed his nose at Israeli Leader, Benjamin Netanyahu to do an interview with "Glozell" Green. You may know that Glozell invented the "Hoodless Hoody" by cutting the Hoods off her children's Hoodies. I had an idea for Hoodless Hoodies that didn't catch on. I wanted to take all the "Hoodlums" out of the Hoodies. I guess I'm ahead of my time.
While this story was on the air complete with footage of Glozell splashing around in a milk and Fruit-Loop filled bathtub and Obama kissing her butt, the King of Saudi Arabia died and Yemen was lost to Iranian backed rebels. That's not a joke. That really happened. It did! Oh well, I guess I can't expect today's 20 somethings to put down their game controllers and stop killing fictional space aliens long enough to focus on the very real war on terror that Obama is losing.
Speaking of losing the war, I was thinking about Wylie Coyote. How is it that he can call up the Acme company and order a kit to build the Space Shuttle and have it sent to him in the middle of the dessert but, he can't call Domino's and have Pizza delivered for dinner? Wouldn't it save millions on his Acme credit card to just order a couple of large Pepperoni Pizzas so he and the Roadrunner could just sit down and work out their differences over lunch? Again, I'm ahead of my time.
Well that's all I have for this week. Tune in next week and see there's any truth to the rumor that Pappa John has been deflating his Pizzas for the Superbowl. Agent 54 out.