Sunday, November 10, 2013

Old Marine Corps Joke

Gunnery Sgt Lee Ermey
  Agent 54 here again.  Today is November 10th, 2015, This is the 240th  Birthday of the United States Marine Corps.  The Marine Corps was born in Tun’s Tavern in Philadelphia, PA in 1775 and we’ve been kicking ass ever since.  I first heard this old Marine joke when I was a Marine Recruit (maggot) in 1981.  I love this joke.  This is my version:

  A platoon of U.S. Army Soldiers was out hiking in formation when the Platoon Leader, a Lieutenant, spotted a Marine Gunnery Sergeant on top of a hill on the platoons left flank.   The Marine began to yell things at the platoon like “you pansies couldn’t fight your way out of a paper bag” and various other taunts and insults. 

  The obviously furious Lieutenant halted the platoon and barked out an order.  “Sergeant, pick your two best fighters and send them up the hill to teach that Marine a lesson”.  The Sergeant sent his two best up the hill.  When the men got near the top of the hill, the Marine disappeared over the top of the hill and the soldiers followed him.
 
Two minutes later the Marine GSGT. Was on top of the hill yelling again.  “Hey you dog faces, is that the best you got?  My grandmother could whip them. 

The obviously very furious Lieutenant bellowed again.  “Sergeant!  Send ten men up the hill to teach that Marine a lesson”.  The Sergeant sent ten men up the hill.  When the men got near the top of the hill, the Marine disappeared over the top of the hill and the soldiers followed him.

  Ten minutes went by and then, one soldier could be seen crawling over top of the hill back to the platoon. looking through his field glasses the Lieutenant could see the soldier was missing his cover and one boot.  His uniform was torn and dirty and he was bleeding from the mouth.

  The obviously very, very furious Lieutenant bellowed again.  “Sergeant!  Prepare the platoon to go up the hill and teach that Marine a lesson.  As they were preparing the crawling soldier tumbled down the hill stopping at the Lieutenant’s feet. 

The obviously very, very, very furious Lieutenant bellowed again.  Private! Report!  The poor Private gasped for air and gave his report the best he could.  “Don’t do it sir. (wheezing) Don’t go up the hill. (gasping) It’s a trap (wheezing) sir, there’s TWO of them!


Semper Fi and Happy Birthday to my band of brothers and sisters.


46 comments:

  1. Love this. I do love those marines. Semper Fi and Happy Birthday to all the marines out there.

    Have a fantastic Silly Sunday. ☺

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    1. Thank you so much for Silly Sunday and have a great day.

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  2. That's great! I can believe I never heard that before. And me, the spawn of a proud Marine. Have a great day!

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    1. I'm glad you enjoyed it and have a fabulous birthday.

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  3. LOL brilliant one I had never heard also ;-)

    Have a tanfastic week and thank you for your visits ;-)

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    1. It's an oldie but a goodie. Thanks for playing.

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  4. Not surprised I haven't heard this one before... my nephew's in the Army. :) So- don't tell him, but I think this is super funny! Thanks Tim, and thank you also for your visits to Blogitudes. Have a great Sunday!

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    1. Thank you for visiting me. I enjoy your blog too.

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  5. That's a good one Tim. Needed a laugh heading into Monday.

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    1. Yeah, I get to work on Monday. Happy Veteran's Day.

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    2. Heard on conservative radio Mark Levin that there is a bill in till Wed Veterans off on Veteran's Day, we damn sure deserve it! Good week to you maybe see you at the range someday? 🐊

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    3. Heard on conservative radio Mark Levin that there is a bill in till Wed Veterans off on Veteran's Day, we damn sure deserve it! Good week to you maybe see you at the range someday? 🐊

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    4. Heard on conservative radio Mark Levin that there is a bill in till Wed Veterans off on Veteran's Day, we damn sure deserve it! Good week to you maybe see you at the range someday? 🐊

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    5. Yeah, I worked today and I get to work tomorrow too but, I have a good job so, I'm not complaining.

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  6. LOL - thank for the laughs. I never heard this one before :)

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  7. That's a good one!. Happy Monday...or not depending...

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  8. Ahahaha, that's one I've never heard before, good one. Thank you for your service!

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    1. You are welcome. Thanks for visiting and commenting.

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  9. Yes, Semper Fi and happy bday. I'm a little late to the celebration, but wishing it all the same.

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    1. Better late than never. Thanks for stopping by.

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  10. I am grinning ear to ear. That story had me at every word. I am a product of the Navy and proud of it - and am so grateful to every single branch of service - so much sacrifice... so much hard work.... I just can't imagine being that brave!

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    1. Thank you. I have had friends from all the branches and I respect all those who served. Just a little inter-service rivalry. Army - Navy football game coming soon. Go Navy!

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  11. LOL! Love it. OOORAH back at cha. Retired Marine spouse here - nice to meet you by way of the PINcentive blog hop.

    BTW I read this whole thing in the voice of Ermey as Sarge in Toy Story.

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    1. Thank you so much for being a new fan. I love Gunney Ermey. I'm working of something with Buzz Lightyear right now. Please come back early and often.

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  12. I think Mary Gentle does a nice version of this joke in her orcs/marines mash up Grunts, only with tiny glittery fairies rather than marines, which adds a certain something.

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    1. I have to look for that and read it. Thanks for contributing.

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  13. Oh this was a great time for me to read this, with it being Veterans Day week, I'm glad I stopped by!

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    1. I did time it that way. Thanks and come back soon.

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  14. Okay, did you quit blogging? I've been missing you. ☺

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    1. I have a new job and I'm working a lot right now. I don't know when I'll get to blog again. Thanks for the kind words.

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  15. I remember this. HHOOOOORAH !!! SEMPER FI, TO MY BROTHERS. THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE. rickyjmyeverlastingsoul.rc@gmail.com

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  16. Interesting! November 2016! Tongue in cheek post!
    Thanks for bringing your post to the Pit Stop last week.
    Janice, Pit Stop Crew

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    1. Uh, actually that was a goof on my part.
      Thanks for pointing that out.

      Please come back early and often.

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  17. Hey this was awesome. Also, my birthday is November 10th. Thanks for stopping by Wild Wednesday Link Up Party. I'm hoping you weren't the one who was passed out with your head in the toilet. If so, I was the one who put you in the bunny jammies and tweety pie slippers. :-)

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    1. I'm telling you, I had nothing to do with any damn Flink Pamingos!

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  18. My brother-in-law would appreciate this :)

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  19. Haha that was a good one. Thanks for putting a smile on my face!

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