Mega-Super Fitting

Agent 54 here again.  I got this call and then the video from this Mega-Super Fitting and was so excited I almost peed my pajamas.  I’ll start my report with the phone call from Megamind to Superman.  Megamind dials 555-Superma.

Superman

Superman:  Hello

Megamind:  Superma, (snicker) how are you?

Superman:  Yeah, real funny there Megamindy.

Megamind:  What?  Oh nevermind.  I have a proto-type suit ready for you to try on and test.

Superman:  Great Megaminor, I’ll be right over.

Megamind:  Oh no you don’t.  Ha ha, you thought I would just tell you where my mega-secret, impenetrable lair was didn’t you.  Well, you can get up pretty early in the morning but, you still can’t outsmart me.

Superman:  Well, how are we going to do this, Megamint?    

                                         

Megamind:  Okay this has got to stop.  First, I’ll say your name correctly if you stop destroying mine when we talk.  Deal?

Superman:  Deal!

Megamind:  Let’s meet at a neutral site like, say,,,Metro Man Museum in Metrocity in one hour.

Superman:  Uh, that doesn’t seem to be real neutral there in your Metrocity.

Megamind

Megamind:  Shccrrrrr what’s that?  Shcchchcch you’re breaking up shrrkrr,,,

Superman:  Okay, I’ll be there.

Megamind:  Good, Minion and I will be there in our disguises.  Don’t look for us, we’ll find you.

Superman:  Okay, whatever.  So, the suit looks good?

Megamind:  You’ll find out in an hour.  “Click”

Scene:  Superman’s magnificent, secret, Crystal Fortress of Solitude.

Lois Lane:  Honey did I hear you talking to Megamind again?

Superman:  Yeah, I’m meeting him in an hour.  That quirky little blue nuttball is more of a pain in the butt than I bargained for.

Lois Lane:  Oh dear, it will all be worth it if you look cute in the new anti-Kryptonite suit.

Superman:  You’re right sweetie.  Say talking on the phone kinda makes me hungry.

Lois Lane:  How did I know that would happen.  Give me a few minutes to make you a Mega-sandwich.

Megamind as Bernard

Superman:  Mega-sandwich?  Okay but, hold the nuttballs.

Scene:  Metro Man Museum in Metrocity in one hour.  Superman is looking at an antique phone booth display and wondering what it is doing in Metro Man’s museum?   A Nerd and a Robot Gorilla approach him.

Bernard:  Superman, what a delightful surprise to have you visit our museum.  I’m Bernard the curator and that is a fine example of a phone booth wouldn't you say.

Superman:  Yes, it is a fine display.  Are you aware that there is a Robot Gorilla with you?

Gorilla:  Hi Superman, nice to meet you.

Superman:  Make that a talking Robot Gorilla.

Megamind: (disguised as Bernard)  Superman, it’s me Megamind and Minion in our Holographic disguises.

Superman:  Yeah, I kinda figured that out.  Your disguise is great but, Minion, a talking Robot Gorilla?  I mean are there other talking Robot Gorillas around here or something?

Minion: (disguised as a talking Robot Gorilla) Uh, no sir, I just like dressing up like a Robot Gorilla.

Superman:  Yeah well, now it makes perfect sense.

Megamind and Minion

Megamind:  Enough foolishness (he hands a garment box with bunnies and ducky’s on it) get in there and try it on.

Superman looks at the box kinda sideways.

Minion:  Sorry Superman, it’s leftover from Easter.  It was all we had.

Superman:  Well, at least this phone booth dressing room is cool.

Superman steps into the booth and step right out again in the new costume.  Megamind and Minion stand there in shock with their jaws gaping open.

Superman:  Uh, It’s a little tight in the crotch region.

Megamind: (regaining his composure) Uh, I guess I underestimated your Supermanlyness.  I can fix that.  Did you look in the mirror yet?

Superman:  No, why? 

Superman looks in the full length mirror and sees that he’s wearing a beautiful new suit but, something is missing.  Ah yes, it’s his head and hands.  Everyone can see the suit but, now the person wearing it is invisible.  Superman quickly checks for his head with his hands.  Everything is where it should be, it’s just invisible.

Superman:  No no no, this will NOT do.  As a Superhero the citizens must see and trust my face.  The deal was for an anti-Kryptonite suit not an Invisibility suit that everyone can see!  How am,,,

Megamind:  Calm down Superman.   This is only the first proto-type.  You know, you can’t rush science.  Let’s try taking the Kryptonite test.  Now I’m going to slowly open this lead case that has just one pound of Kryptonite in it.  Respond if you feel anything.

Superman puking

Megamind begins to slowly open the case.

Superman:  Ugh, Awh, shut that thing, I’m gonna puke!

Megamind:  Minion, make a notes.  Failed Kryptonite test, Causes invisible test subject and tight in the crotch.

Minion:  Got it sir.

Superman:  Ugh, I still don’t feel too good.  I think the suit makes it worse.  I’m gonna change before someone sees Superman puking out of an invisible head.

Megamind:  Minion, make that Really, Really Failed the Kryptonite test.  I wonder where we went wrong?  Maybe we cured the Lead-Carbon Nano Tube Fibers in Ultra-violet light for too long.

Superman has changed and looks like he’s back to his super self.

Superman:  Wow, that was really bad.  It makes me wonder, did I pick the right guy for this job?

Megamind:  Of course you did!  This was just the first prototype and we learned a lot from it.

Superman:  Yeah, like what?

Megamind:  Well, I have to go back to my mega-secret, impenetrable lair and analyze the results scientifically before,,,

Superman:  (Interrupting) Look!  Next time you call me, I expect better.  I’m outa here.

Superman flies off through a sky-lite back to his magnificent, secret, Crystal Fortress of Solitude.  Back at the museum, Minion and Megamind discuss the day’s events.

Minion:  Wow, sir, he wasn’t real happy with you, uh I mean us.

Megamind:  Ha! Then let him make his own suit.  He’ll get over it.  He knows that only me, Megamind has any chance of making this thing work.

Minion:  Well, I thought that invisible body in the visible suit was pretty cool.

Megamind:  It is pretty cool isn’t it?  Just not very practical.

Minion:  Well, I thought that on Halloween you could make headless horseman costume that would be a big hit.

Megamind:  Ah Minion, you always know the right things to say to cheer my evilness up.  Let’s grab this stuff and get out of here.

Minion:  Yes sir, by the way, did you see the look on his face when he looked in the mirror?  Oh, I guess not! 

Both villainous beings chuckle.  

Megamind and Minion working in the lab.

Well, before science can have spectacular success they often have spectacular failures.  Let’s hope it goes better next time for Megamind and Superman. 

Super Problem 
Mega-Super Project