Sunday, December 20, 2015

Merry Christmas from Ron Burgundy

Hey there America.  You’re looking good.


  Well, Ron Burgundy has conceded the race to President Elect Donald Trump.  It was a great race for Ron and now It’s time to celebrate the holidays with friends and family.   
  Ron Burgundy made this statement:  I have to thank my Campaign Manager The Only Wendy Shade, My Financial/Spiritual Adviser Howard  and Campaign volunteers John, Joe B., Maureen, and Tim  for the many hours they have contributed to my election to the highest office in the land in 2016.  They’re really all the best and we’ve had a lot of fun.  

  In this season of giving, I want to remind you that there are many Americans out there who aren’t as fortunate as the rest of us and we should all do something to help those Americans this time of year.  Personally, I bought and gift wrapped two new doggie chew toys, one goes under the tree for Baxter and one goes into the Toys for Tots box that the Marines put out in the mall.  The Marine Corps will make sure the toys go to children and dogs who may not have received anything this year if it wasn’t for your generosity.   

  I want to tell you that I know this country was starving for leadership and I wanted to feed it.  America needs a real man with brawn and great hair.  We face many challenges in the future down the road and I wanted to be behind the wheel.  I wanted to steer America around the potholes and through the toll booths to greener pastures.  It is in those pastures that I wanted to milk the cows of human kindness so that no child is left without milk.  I wanted to be the Duct Tape that repairs the split we see in our society today.

  Well, that’s what Wendy wanted me to tell you but, it’s really more like what I told Elvis when I met him in New Orleans.  Elvis asked me why I really wanted to be President and I thought about it and it was pretty simple.  For years I’ve thought that I was, you know, quote a pretty big deal but, then someone showed me that I really hadn’t done much in my whole life for anyone else.  So, when someone suggested that I had Presidential hair, I thought this was a way to really do something good for other people.

  I’ve met some very interesting Americans on our campaign tour of America.  There was Fred Sanford in St. Louis who may become the next “Junkmaster General of the USA”.  I met a hairdresser at Fenway Park and race car driver Ricky Bobby in North Carolina.  I partied with Kim in Green Bay and talked to Carl Spackler in The Great Northwest and I even met Cher.

  What I’ve learned on the campaign trail is that we’re really all the same.  We all want the freedom and the opportunity to do our own thing the best way we can.  We all want to be safe and we all want a secure future for our country and our children and we all want to spend the holidays with family.  I now want to with President Elect Donald Trump the best of luck to Make America Great Again. 


 Wishing you a Merry Christmas and a Happy and Prosperous New Year!


 Ron Burgundy

Ugly Christmas Sweaters

20 comments:

  1. That was great Timothy. More than great.

    You and yours have a very Merry Christmas and a prosperous New Year too. Happy Silly Sunday too. ☺

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    1. You are too kind.

      Have a great Holiday season.

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  2. I liked that but still had to giggle at the name Wendy Shade :-)

    Sending a Merry Christmas & Happy New Year from London UK :-)

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  3. Thank you for linking up to the Holidays Celebration Link Party! Happy Holidays!

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    1. Thank you for having the party.

      I write funny stuff. Please visit my blog early and often.

      Merry Christmas.

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  4. Anyone who donates doggy chew toys to toys for tots gets my vote. Keep up the good work on the election trail.
    A little late but a Merry Christmas to you

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  5. Oh this country sure does need some duct tape at the moment... :) Thanks for linking up with #GlobalBlogging!

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    1. Yes we do and thank you for allowing me to share.

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  6. Yes, Agent 54, we need Ron more than ever. There is something oddly comforting in his perfectly coiffed hair & awesome stache. Make America classy again, Ron!

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    1. Ron thanks you for your support and "Merry Christmas".

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  7. Hi,
    Thanks for bringing your post to the Blogger's Pit Stop last week.
    Janice

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  8. Hi, thanks for linking up to my #HighlightsofHappy on instagram linky. But the idea is to link up your favourite pictures that you've posted on instagram. You've posted on my #AllSortsofBlogs linky before and I would welcome your posts on that linky because they're more suited to that one. Here's the latest post ~ http://virtuallyallsorts.com/allsortsofblogs-best-blogs-to-read-58/ Just for info, a new one will be published on Friday. Thanks!

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  10. I don't understand the last line, "I now want to with President Elect Donald Trump the best of luck to Make America Great Again." Do you mean, "I now want to wish President Elect Donald Trump the best of luck to Make America Great Again."?

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