Agent 54 is a regular guy. He has a sense of humor and an active imagination. Agent 54 works for the Nominal Secrets Apparatus (NSA) under the DORD (Department of Redundancy Department) as a Listener/Reader. His job is to read, view or listen to data collected by the NSA and determine if there is a risk to national security. Agent 54 reports to his bosses, H. Cuffs and Max (Agent 86). He doesn’t take his job too seriously because he knows he’s spying on regular people most of the time.
Sunday, January 24, 2016
Agent 54 here again.
I got to listen in on another of
Blitzed Wolfer’s interviews this week.
Blitzed flew out to Arizona to find The Scarecrow, The Tinman and The
Cowardly Lion, who are still good buddies after all these years. Let’s catch up with our old friends.
Hello again, this is Blitzed Wolfer for CAN and I’m here in Chandler,
Arizona at the location of the CLTMSC
Security LLC company. I’m here to find
out how our old buddies from The Wizard of OZ are doing. Let’s go inside.
it looks like a typical Bail Bondsman’s office with wanted posters and a
general law enforcement theme. The
Cowardly Lion greets Blitzed.
Hi, how ya doin?
Hello Mr. Lion. We spoke on the
phone about the interview.
Of course we did. C’mon in. Make yourself comfortable. Ya know, you can call me CL.
Blitzed: Thank you CL. So, where are the other guys?
CL: Oh, TM,
uh, that’s the Tinman, he’s out collecting a bail jumper. Ya know the Tinman always gets his man, ah ha
ha, that’s clever…and The Scarecrow?
CL: Oh, he’s
in the back office, numbers crunching as usual.
you guys all work here?
CL: Yeah, we
created this business together. I’m the
front lion and I manage and train our security guard employees. Ya know, since I found my courage, I’ve
really gotten good at this self-defense type stuff.
see, it looks like you’re doing well here.
Why did the three of you come to Arizona?
Cl: Oh, well,
ya know, after that whole Wicked Witch of the West fiasco, we had to get the
heck out of The Emerald City in a hurry!
Really? I thought you guys were
big heroes there. What happened?
CL: Oh yeah,
the people loved us and I was elected King of the Forrest and all but, then the
lawsuits started. That darned WWW has
about 50 cousins and half of them are lawyers.
I ain’t scared a nuttin no more except lawyers. Damn lawyers!
don’t blame you. So, do you ever hear
The Tinman comes through the front door, without his
CL: TM! Where’s your guy?
TM: Sorry CL,
I found him but, you know he has a family and he has to work the night shift to
earn the money to pay for day care for the kids and…
of TM) Ya let him go again.
TM: Sorry CL.
this happen often?
often! TM, how many times have I told
you? Ya have to control that over-sized heart of yours. SC is going to have a
The Scarecrow comes out of the back room wearing a
green account’s visor, pencil behind his ear and holding a financial ledger in
his arms. He looks up over his reading
Tinman! Your back. Where is he?
TM: Sorry SC.
(angrily) I don’t believe
it. Now how do you expect me to pay for
your annual rust proofing? Honestly, you
give migraines and I don’t even have a brain.
The Tinman starts to weep.
TM a tissue) Cut it out. It’ll be okay.
The Scarecrow rushes back into his office and slams
the door behind him.
CL: Take it
easy TM. You know SC is a worrier. It will all be okay.
TM: I dunno,
he looked pretty mad. You know, I think
he still resents me for insisting we come to Arizona.
Nonsense! He knows that if we
stayed in Kansas, you would have rusted to death by now and he’d still be out
standing in a field.
Pardon me for interrupting but, is this business in trouble?
CL: Well, in
this “Obama Recovery” nobody is doing great but, we’ll get by. Hey, thanks for coming out Blitzed and tell
all your friends to call CLTMSC Security LLC for all their security needs.
Blitzed:Thank you CL.Well that raps it
up.This is Blitzed Wolfer for CAN from
Chandler, Arizona saying “thanks for watching”.
flying monkeys! I had no idea those guys
were in Arizona. Stay tuned to Agent 54
to see who Blitzed Wolfer interviews next.