Saturday, February 27, 2016

Bernie and the Jets


 Agent 54 here again.  Today I heard another of  Blitzed Wolfer’s great interviews.   It was with Bernie Sanders and his band “The Jets”.   They were warming up for an evening show in a small auditorium on a small college campus.  Here’s my report.

Scene:  Small stage in a small auditorium on a small college campus.  A band is tuning and setting up their equipment.  The keyboard player is none other than Bernie Sanders who is actually still in a Presidential Primary race.  Blitzed Wolfer and his film crew approach Candidate Sanders with the microphone and a camera.

Blitzed Wolfer:  Hi ya, Bernie.

Bernie Sanders:  Well, if it isn’t my old friend Mr. Wolfer.  How ya been you old dog?

Blitzed:  Fine, so tell me, how’s the band sounding?

Bernie:  Well, they try hard but, they ain’t The Beatles and I’m no John  Lennon, I’ll tell ya that.

Not John Lennon
Blitzed:  Isn’t that Billy-Bob Jones who used to play with the Allman Brothers in the 70s, playing bass for you?

Bernie:  Nah, that’s Bobby Smith who played with the Almond Brothers or some other nuttballs a long time ago.  I dunno, who can remember?

Blitzed:  So, are you here just to get away from the stress of the campaign trail for a while?

Bernie:  Yeah, and ya know, I gotta pay the bills too.

Blitzed:  Yes, I was going to ask you about that.  I heard the ticket price for this little event was $250.00.  Isn’t that a little steep for a band that is “not The Beatles”?

Bernie:  Steep- Schmeep!  What, don’t I have a right to earn a decent living?

Blitzed:  Well, of course you do but, you know you are the one always preaching about how everything should be free for everybody.  Isn’t there some hypocrisy in charging such a high price to these kids here who will be struggling to pay their student loans?

Bernie:  Hippo – Schmippo!  These kids coming here tonight represent the 1% that can come out to our show.  Let’s just consider the 250 clams a Tax on the rich.  They have to pay their fair share so the other kids don’t have to hear how bad we really are.

Blitzed:  But, what if the 1% kids decide they want to go to the show down the street that is charging $25.00 to hear a much better band?

Bernie:  Then we’ll throw those bastards in jail!

Blitzed:  Uh, that makes no sense.  If you jail the kids for not seeing your show, they can’t go to either show and both bands go broke.

Bernie:  Broke-Schmoke!  We’ll throw them in jail and make them pay a $500.00 fine to the Government and then the Government can pay my band to perform in the jail and everybody is happy.

Blitzed:  Happy-Schmappy!  What about the innocent American kids you jailed and forced to hear your band?

Bernie:  To hell with them.  They shouldn’t have been in the 1%.

Blitzed:  Uh, yeah, uh, well, I gotta go now. (under his breath and to his film crew) let’s get the heck out of here.  The Crazy is getting a little deep in here.

Bernie:  Okay, I’ll see you later for the show and don’t forget your $250 bucks and that goes for your crew too.

Wow!  I guess we learned something about Socialist Economic Policy or Economic Socialist Policy or maybe just plain old Insanity.

What do you think?


  1. Yes you did and it won't work here either. When the money runs out and it always does, it will be the failure that it has always been.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

    1. I think this election could be "Yuge".

      Have a great election year.

  2. LMAO @ Bernie "Pull My Fingers" Sanders

    Have a bonkerstastic day :-)

    1. Thank you and don't let anyone pull your leg or your finger.

  3. Hey Agent 54, you haven't posted in a while. Everything OK?

    1. Yes, thank you for asking. I'm getting ready to write some more.

  4. Agent 54, please help stop the Liberal Lunacy. =) I think Ron Burgundy can handle that. =)

  5. Very amusing, Agent 54. Bernie Sanders in a band? That would've been better than the hot mess that was the entire campaign trail!

    1. Well, he's just trying to earn a living.

      Thanks for all of your support.

      Google put me on a Google time out for two weeks. I won't be able to share for a while but, I'll be back.

  6. Well, I'm sure glad I found your page. Extremely amusing! I laughed all the way through it. My husband is a musician & he likes to follow the politics and he also thought this was quite amusing. Thanks for the laughs!!! Following you.... Have a rockin' week!

    1. Thank you so much. Please come back and checkout some of my other silly stories and pictures.

      Thanks again.

  7. I laughed so hard reading this! And the Not John Lennon, hysterical! Thanks for joining us on #GlobalBlogging

    1. Glad you enjoyed it. Please come back to check out my other silly stories. Thanks for allowing me to share.