Bernie and the Jets

Agent 54 here again.  Today I heard another of  Blitzed Wolfer’s great interviews.   It was with Bernie Sanders and his band “The Jets”.   They were warming up for an evening show in a small auditorium on a small college campus.  Here’s my report.

Scene:  Small stage in a small auditorium on a small college campus.  A band is tuning and setting up their equipment.  The keyboard player is none other than Bernie Sanders who was actually cheated in a Presidential Primary race by Crooked Hillary in 2016.  Blitzed Wolfer and his film crew approach Candidate Sanders with the microphone and a camera.

Blitzed Wolfer:  Hi ya, Bernie.

Bernie Sanders:  Well, if it isn’t my old friend Mr. Wolfer.  How ya been you old dog?

Blitzed:  Fine, so tell me, how’s the band sounding?

Bernie:  Well, they try hard but, they ain’t The Beatles and I’m no John  Lennon, I’ll tell ya that.

Not John Lennon

Blitzed:  Isn’t that Billy-Bob Jones who used to play with the Allman Brothers in the 70s, playing bass for you?

Bernie:  Nah, that’s Bobby Smith who played with the Almond Brothers or some other nuttballs a long time ago.  I dunno, who can remember?

Blitzed:  So, are you here just to get away from the stress of the campaign trail for a while?

Bernie:  Yeah, and ya know, I gotta pay the bills too.

Blitzed:  Yes, I was going to ask you about that.  I heard the ticket price for this little event was $250.00.  Isn’t that a little steep for a band that is “not The Beatles”?

Bernie:  Steep- Schmeep!  What, don’t I have a right to earn a decent living?

Blitzed:  Well, of course you do but, you know you are the one always preaching about how everything should be free for everybody.  Isn’t there some hypocrisy in charging such a high price to these kids here who will be struggling to pay their student loans?

Bernie:  Hippo – Schmippo!  These kids coming here tonight represent the 1% that can come out to our show.  Let’s just consider the 250 clams a Tax on the rich.  They have to pay their fair share so the other kids don’t have to hear how bad we really are.

Blitzed:  But, what if the 1% kids decide they want to go to the show down the street that is charging $25.00 to hear a much better band?

Bernie:  Then we’ll throw those bastards in jail!

Blitzed:  Uh, that makes no sense.  If you jail the kids for not seeing your show, they can’t go to either show and both bands go broke.

Bernie:  Broke-Schmoke!  We’ll throw them in jail and make them pay a $500.00 fine to the Government and then the Government can pay my band to perform in the jail and everybody is happy.

Blitzed:  Happy-Schmappy!  What about the innocent American kids you jailed and forced to hear your band?

Bernie:  To hell with them.  They shouldn’t have been in the 1%.

Blitzed:  Uh, yeah, uh, well, I gotta go now. (under his breath and to his film crew) let’s get the heck out of here.  The Crazy is getting a little deep in here.

Bernie:  Okay, I’ll see you later for the show and don’t forget your $250 bucks and that goes for your crew too.

Wow!  I guess we learned something about Socialist Economic Policy or Economic Socialist Policy or maybe just plain old Insanity.

What do you think?

Secret Debate

That's a Terrible Lie

Stupid is as Stupid Does

Franken Stein 2020

The Count and The Re-Count