My Job as a Super Snooper

Agent 54

Well, I did it.  I got a gig as a Listener-Reader for the Nominal Secrets Apparatus (NSA) which is under the Department of Redundancy Department (DORD).

 I went through the Union to get my job.  It’s the Brotherhood of Secret Electronically Recorded Surveillances (BSers).


That’s right, I get paid to listen to your 
conversations on the phone or recorded by electronic bugs or picked up by satellite and I read your e-mail, snail mail and sometimes your junk mail.  I’m supposed to identify callers and pass up to my boss, Hamilton Cuffs, a former big city detective, anything that might be a threat to National Security.  My boss is a good guy and around the NSA we call him H. Cuffs.  I'm curious though, because he never really said what big city he's from. 

  The very first phone call I got was interesting.  It went like this:

Sergi:  Hey Boris, why did chicken cross road?

Boris:  Cuz was stupid chicken, ha ha ha

Sergi: ha ha, Da Da, ha ha ha

Yeah, Uh, I’m not going to bother H. Cuffs with this call.  I don’t think there’s much of a national security threat from these two.

Until next time this is Agent 54 saying “God Bless America!”

UPDATE 3/4/2017:  The NSA under the DORD is now investigating the "Bugging" of the telephones in at Trump Tower during the election of 2016.

What did Obama know and when did he know it?   

UPDATE 3/29/17:  The NSA under the DORD has found a mountain of evidence of Russian influence over the American political system.

The evidence is all contained in the book Clinton Cash By Peter Schweizer.

UPDATE 4/1/17:  New evidence points to Monica Lewinsky with a cigar for her involvement in the Russian Hacking of the 2016 election. 

UPDATE 4/3/17:  Gotcha!  My update from 4/1/17 was an April Fool's Joke.  Susan Rice has obviously been a Russian operative in the White House under Obama.

Let's get to the bottom of the whole Russian thing. 

Weird Day at the NSA

New Year's Party at the NSA

NSA Petting Zoo

NSA Annual Company Picnic