Agent 54 is a regular guy. He has a sense of humor and an active imagination. Agent 54 works for the Nominal Secrets Apparatus (NSA) under the DORD (Department of Redundancy Department) as a Listener/Reader. His job is to read, view or listen to data collected by the NSA and determine if there is a risk to national security. Agent 54 reports to his bosses, H. Cuffs and Max (Agent 86). He doesn’t take his job too seriously because he knows he’s spying on regular people most of the time.
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Conversations from Punnsylvania
Agent 54 here
again. So, my wife said “honey I’m a
little dizzy” and I said “I know but, I married you anyway”. I was trying to imagine a funny conversation
that Agent 54 could listen in on when it hit me that many of my real
conversations, however brief are very funny. I know from funny and I'm funny.
My wife was torturing me on Labor Day with
another Romantic Comedy (chick flick) starring The beautiful and talented
Sandra Bullock and dumbass Englishman Hugh Grant. After a few minutes of casual observance, I
stated that “this flick would be better with the sound off”. I said
“So, she works for him, what’s her job, keep him from being an asshole? “She’s a lawyer” Carol responded. I said “I think it’s going to take more than
a Lawyer. I think he needs a doctor, lawyer
, an Indian Chief and a Rabbi”. “Shut up
and eat your bagels” Carol barked. “Yes
Dear” Nothing wrong with this movie that
a few car chases, some explosions, a pole dance or two, a Lunar landing and
some gun shots wouldn’t fix, I thought quietly to myself.
I saw something about a book titled 50
Shades of Grey . My wife called it
“mommy porn”. The main character is
Christian Grey. I guess if I was the
main character in a book, because I have IBS it might be titled 50 Shits a
Day. My wife musically said “Dump to
da dump, to da dump to da dump, dump, dump”.
Was that funny? I usually know
from funny. I think she may have made a
Nuttball with Football
My wife likes sports and I drive her nutz
with my wisecracks when we watch games.
I see a player named Shaw and I’ll say “there’s Ric Shaw, he’s in the
travel business in the off season.
Watching NASCAR I asked her “don’t you think
Jimmy John’s sandwich co. should sponsor NASCAR Champion Jimmie Johnson? “Shut up and finish your sandwich” said
When we watch football it’s like
Punnsylvania in my living room.
University of Pittsburgh Quarterback is named
Savage. Just before halftime they had a
chance to score. I told my wife “ the
coach has to turn Savage loose”.
some NFL news and I said “the Jets just signed QB Brady Quinn because they
think he can win and they threw QB Graham Harrell into the trash barrel.
Watching Purdue vs. Notre Dame
football game. I told Carol that Purdue
missed the field goal. She said “the
chickens missed it”. I said “yeah, they
clucked it up”.
player is named Bob King. He has a cousin who is a good golfer named Par
King. His other cousin is a Norseman named
Vi King. He has a skinny cousin who is
wicked smart named Thin king. They say his sister is a drunk and a real dog named Bar King. His other sister is a terrible dancer named Twer King. His Pirate cousin is the lookout on the crows mast. Name is Sea King.
I saw a
player named Herring. Something fishy
about him. A. Hunter plays for
Purdue. His first name is Antelope. His brother B. Hunter is on the team. Yes he is Bear Hunter. Their cousin is T. Hunter. That’s right, Treasure Hunter. Did I tell you about the cajun family that goes by the name Ting? The twin brothers were One Ting and Same Ting. We had a party but, we didn't invite them. We had no Ting.