Agent 54 is a regular guy. He has a sense of humor and an active imagination. Agent 54 works for the Nominal Secrets Apparatus (NSA) under the DORD (Department of Redundancy Department) as a Listener/Reader. His job is to read, view or listen to data collected by the NSA and determine if there is a risk to national security. Agent 54 reports to his bosses, H. Cuffs and Max (Agent 86). He doesn’t take his job too seriously because he knows he’s spying on regular people most of the time.
Saturday, March 14, 2015
here again. I got to listen to a call
between some Super Heroes of mine. You
know they have personal problems from time to time that they want to solve too. Here’s my report on Superman and his problem
and who he looked to for advice.
Buzz Lightyear: Hello this is Buzz Lightyear of Star Command.
Superman: Hello Buzz this is Superman, I was wondering
if I could talk to you about something.
Buzz: Superman! Well this is a surprise. What’s the trouble? Is the Galaxy being
threatened by some intergalactic bad guys again?
Superman: No, no, nothing like that. It’s…
Buzz: (interrupting) Because Buzz Lightyear is
ready at a moment’s notice to go to Infinity and beyond to help you
protect the Universe, Superman.
Superman: Yeah, that’s great Buzz but, it’s more
personal than that.
Superman: Well, everyone knows that I have like an
allergy, only worse, to Kryptonite. I
mean prolonged exposure to that stuff could kill me.
Buzz: That’s really bad.
Superman: Yeah, well you know that if I can encase the
Kryptonite in lead, then I can just fly it out of the galaxy and just chuck it
as far as I can and it’s gone.
Buzz: I guess you can chuck it to infinity…
Calm down. It’s just you and me
here. You don’t have to put a show on
Buzz: Got it.
I get carried away sometimes.
Superman: It’s okay.
So, by now I’ve had these lead cases made and I’ve chucked every piece
of Kryptonite I can get my hands on, well not literally because I can’t touch
the stuff but, I’ve chucked tons of this stuff away. Still my enemies seem to come up with more of
it. I don’t know where they get it.
Buzz: Maybe it’s an underground Kryptonite black
market. You want me to investigate and
put a stop to this evil business?
Superman: Yeah, uh, that would be great but, I was
thinking more about protection for myself.
Buzz: You want me to be your Kryptonite body guard?
Superman: No, now hang in there with me Buzz. It’s just that I know you have some Hi-tech
equipment and I was thinking about a new custom made costume for me that might
have the protection of lead but, be light weight and pliable enough for me to fly
around and beat the hell out of bad guys and rescue people and all. So, tell me, who makes all your stuff?
Buzz: All my equipment is issued to me from Star
Command. I’m afraid the manufacturer is
top secret. I couldn’t divulge that
information even if I knew it.
Superman: Top Secret!
I’m Superman for cryin out loud!
Buzz: I’m super sorry, Superman.
Superman: Yeah, well, I knew it was a long shot. Thanks anyway Buzz.
Buzz: Wait a space minute, I think I know someone
who can help you. Yes, he’s always
making his costume materials out of those super strong carbon nanotube fibers. I’m sure he could come up with something for
Superman: Terrific! Who is it?
Buzz: You remember that quirky little blue headed
guy? Real smart, thinks he’s evil but,
he’s really just a control freak.
Remember? Megamind from Metro
Superman: Oh yeah, I remember him now. He is smart.
Maybe he could come up with a lead-carbon nanotube fiber combination
that would do the job. Hey, do you have
Buzz: Absolutely, it’s 555-v-i-l-l-i-a-n.
Superman: Thanks a million Buzz. If this works out you could literally be a
Buzz: Glad to be of service to you Superman,
because it’s all part of a Space Ranger’s creed to protect the Universe and…
Superman: (interrupting) I’m going to call Megamind now.
Buzz: Oh, you know I think he’s on vacation with
Ritchi in Belize. If you call him now
you’ll just get his sidekick, Minion. I’d
try him next week.
Superman: Thanks Buzz.
Buzz: One more thing Superman. When you talk to Megamind you have to
remember that he thinks he’s evil. How
are you going to convince him to work with you for good and not evil?
Superman: Good question. I guess I’ll have to make a deal with him to
look the other way if he keeps his “evilness” confined to Metro City.
Buzz: Metrocity, he calls it Metrocity as in all
Superman: Metrocity, like atrocity? What a nuttball! Well, I guess eccentricity is the price you
pay for genius. Okay, see you later
Buzz: Goodbye Superman, To,,, the kitchen to make
Superman: Bye Buzz, Click.
was so exciting. Can you imagine a
Lead-Carbon Nanotube Fiber suit for Superman?
I can’t wait to listen to the call from Superman to Megamind. That’s gonna be wicked cool.